I am a bit of a perfectionist! There, I said it. That trait has stood to me so much through my life in terms of my ability to organise, my attention to detail and my writing, to name a few. But it can also be my greatest enemy! Let me explain…
Perfectionists often have very high standards for themselves, for others and for various aspects of their homes and their lives. Although high standards can serve us to a degree, they often put us into procrastination mode, continually over-thinking and analysing and changing our minds about what we feel we need to do to get things in order. Instead of taking the action we so desperately desire we become paralysed. We think “It will never be right anyway, so why bother?” and as we remain in this stuck state we start to feel overwhelmed. Overwhelm can manifest itself in many different ways, including worry, doubt, guilt, anger, anxiousness, helplessness and confusion. We might suffer from headaches or a tightness in our chests when we think about what we feel we should do.
Perfectionists tend to start into tasks with great zest, and somewhat into the process they often begin to feel disillusioned or frustrated. Let me give you an example. You have great plans to paint a room in your house, and as you start into the painting you find yourself looking at the skirting and architraves that could (even more noticeably, now) do with a retouch too. And those high expectations quickly quash your enthusiasm, taking the good out of the lovely painting you’ve just done. Or you begin to declutter your wardrobe with gusto, and then you start thinking about all the other parts of your home that also could do with a good clear-out. You start to lose interest because you just can’t imagine each area of the house ever being exactly the way you want it to be, so you feel defeated and you stop. And then you feel worse than you did before you started! Sound familiar?
That inevitable sinking, hopeless feeling can sometimes put you off embarking on positive life change. Isn’t it ironic that being a perfectionist can stop you from making any progress at all?
With decluttering (or anything worth doing, for that matter), it’s a step-by-step process. Not everything around us can be 100% perfect all of the time – it’s just not a healthy or realistic standard to maintain. I often use the saying “Happy, not perfect”, and I think that’s so wise. Don’t let your perfectionism ultimately hold you back from being happy.
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